When we find ourselves lost, yearning for support, we are often unaware that what we are truly longing for is our own presence. This longing is a call from within, a deep desire to reconnect with our true self. In moments of desperation, we mistakenly search outward for solace, when in fact, the support we seek lies within our ability to be with ourselves—fully, tenderly, and mindfully.

Mindfulness is the gentle art of observing. It is the practice of being aware—aware of our bodies, our minds, the energy that flows through us, and the world around us. It is an awareness that encompasses both our wants and needs, and the parts of us that clamor for attention, often in ways that sweep us away like a gust of wind.

To cultivate mindfulness is to cultivate the witness within—a part of us that observes without judgment, that sees clearly what is happening in the present moment. In this place of mindful awareness, we begin to notice that we are not singular in our experience. We vacillate between two personas: one rigid and outcome-focused, driven by the mind, and the other fluid and heart-centered, guided by our true self.

The mind, in its effort to protect us, often creates a defensive guard. This protection can take many forms—closing ourselves off, hiding in judgment, living in anger, or getting lost in depression and despair. These defenses, while initially intended to shield us, become symptoms of a life lived out of alignment with our heart. They are manifestations of fear and self-deprecation, keeping us stuck in a cycle of suffering.

In contrast, when we are mindful, we allow ourselves to see with clarity. There is no judgment, only the gentle recognition of what is occurring within us. Our feelings—those raw expressions of our heart—are not to be feared or avoided. They are to be felt, fully and completely, for it is only through feeling that we can begin to heal. Yet, many of us have been taught to move away from pain, to fix or protect rather than to sit with and embrace our suffering.

This is where the practice of self-compassion becomes transformative. It invites us to turn towards our pain, to hold it with tenderness, to be with it in full acceptance and love. It encourages us to feel these parts of ourselves that we might otherwise push away. In doing so, we create space for healing, rather than getting lost in the urgency to act or defend.

However, there is a balance to be struck. While it is essential to feel our emotions, it is equally important not to become over-identified with them. When we blend too closely with our emotions, they can consume us, leading to reactions that are disproportionate to the situations we face. We have all had experiences where our response seemed out of proportion, where we felt swept away by a tide of emotion that was difficult to control.

Mindfulness offers us a different way. It teaches us to notice what is, without exaggerating or allowing it to define us. By moving into the seat of the observer, we create a distance that allows us to see our thoughts and feelings as they are—like clouds passing in the sky, trains arriving and departing, or tides ebbing and flowing. Just because we think something does not make it true. The stories we tell ourselves can become traps, reinforcing negative thoughts and destructive emotions.

But when we bring mindfulness and compassion together, we create a pause. In this pause, we find the space to choose our response with intention rather than reacting out of habit. This is where true freedom lies—the freedom to meet our pain with compassion, to let go of the resistance that causes suffering, and to embrace our reality with open-hearted acceptance.

Consider something as everyday as road rage. The suffering in that moment is not caused by the traffic itself, but by our resistance to it—by our comparison of reality to the ideal of a clear, open road. When we resist what is, we suffer. But when we bring mindfulness to the moment, we can observe our frustration without being consumed by it. We can acknowledge the discomfort without letting it dictate our response.

In this dance between mind and heart, mindfulness becomes our guide. It leads us back to ourselves, to that place of inner support we were longing for all along. And in that place, we find that we are never truly alone. We have within us the capacity to be present with ourselves, to offer compassion, and to navigate the ebb and flow of life with grace and clarity.

So, the next time you find yourself lost and longing for support, remember this: you are longing for your own presence. Turn inward, observe with mindfulness, and meet yourself with the compassion you deserve. In doing so, you will discover the true support that has always been within you.