As a brief recap, reparenting is the process of connecting with your inner child and providing for them in a way that you are uniquely able to, as you are the best person to identify and meet your needs. This journey involves prioritizing yourself and trusting in your intrinsic worth to ensure that your inner child feels seen, heard, and understood. If you experience any of the following, you may benefit from reparenting: a fear of criticism that holds you back from life, finding yourself breaking commitments to yourself, struggling with unsatisfying relationship patterns, not creating and/or maintaining healthy boundaries, or having a general sense of worthlessness, inadequacy, or feeling disempowered.

We have previously reviewed three of the four pillars of reparenting in previous episodes: self-discipline and self-care. This week, we will delve into another aspect of this important process: embracing joy. Do you struggle with creativity, spontaneity, or play? If you answer yes to any of these, then this is an area deserving of your attention.

As children, we’re often discouraged from pursuing creative expressions because they may seem impractical. Parents, concerned about the future financial stability of their children, might steer them away from creative paths, fearing they’ll end up as ‘starving artists.’ Perhaps your family placed a high value on academics, leaving little room for creative play. Did you have opportunities to play in your family? Did you witness family members engaging in play? I often engage in play with my grandchildren, and sometimes their boundless imaginations can be overwhelming. I’ve heard similar sentiments from others as well. It’s intriguing to consider how often people might opt to stifle imagination rather than embrace the challenge of venturing into the unknown.

As young individuals, we often absorb beliefs and notions about adulthood. We hear adults speak of responsibility in a manner that suggests work and play are mutually exclusive. Our sense of childlike wonder often gives way to a pragmatic view shaped by schedules, budgets, and productivity. There’s a societal expectation to be constantly ‘busy,’ as though it is a badge of honor equated with success, while enjoying a work-life balance with room for play and creativity can be seen as deviating from the norm. Amid the hustle and bustle of daily life, spontaneity often fades away. Years ago, I made a surprising discovery: by scheduling time for spontaneity, I regained a sense of it. It may seem counterintuitive, but it works. This could involve setting aside an hour each week or one day each month to connect with your inner child, to discern their desires and needs, and to fulfill them.

Creativity, play, spontaneity and joy are all essential ingredients in a fulfilling life, in our mental fitness, and in our emotional health. I often talk with clients who express uncertainty about what truly brings them joy. Caught up in work or caregiving responsibilities, they often forget about their own needs and interests. As a result, they may struggle to identify hobbies or activities that ignite their passion. What brings you joy? What makes you smile or laugh until your belly hurts? 

The teachable takeaway for this week is to practice embracing joy. Choose one thing: will you block off time for spontaneity, take a moment to be creative and break out those paints or knitting needles, or schedule a playdate with yourself to go rollerskating? Tune in to learn more about embracing joy, and share in the comments where you found joy this week. I’m eager to hear all about it!